Trust is a big thing for me. I’m not sure when it became an issue in my life, but I know that by middle school it affected most of my friendships. I didn’t trust the friends that I had. In fact, I probably didn’t have the greatest friends to begin with… I was always the one in the group that –as I would call it now – was the responsible one, the level headed one. This continued into high school – and then my college years – to the point where I alienated almost everyone around me.
I am blessed now to have a handful of close friends, enough to count on my fingers in fact. These are the friends that I trust. These are the friends that I know I can count on and I know I can call if I feel like my life is falling apart.
But for some reason, I haven’t been trusting God like that. I don’t know why.
The day before beginning this 90 day journey through the Bible, I wrote out some thoughts… a prayer really… that God show me who He is, so that I can TRUST Him. So I asked this… “In so many ways, I’m asking God to show me what He wants in my life – but in truth, I really NEED Him to show me who He is and that I can trust Him.”
Now fast forward to Day 2 of the reading. A couple of pages into it, I begin reading about Lot being rescued from Sodom & Gomorrah – and when his wife was turned to a pillar of salt.
“When he hesitated, the men grasped his hand and the hands of his wife and of his two daughters and led them safely out of the city, for the LORD was merciful to them.” (Genesis 19:16)
“By the time Lot reached Zoar, the sun had risen over the land.” (Genesis 19:23)
“But Lot’s wife looked back, and she became a pillar of salt.” (Genesis 19:26)
In all the times that I have read this story, I never realized – or maybe I had been taught the Sunday School version of the lesson that well – that Lot was the first to hesitate. The men sent by God grabbed his hands for him to continue on. The other thing I learned was that Lot and his family had already reached another city before God destroyed Sodom & Gomorrah. Lot’s wife didn’t look back on the road or during the journey… but rather after they had arrived at their next destination.
A couple of quick chapters later came the story of Rebekah leaving her home to become Isaac’s wife. Her family had begged for her to stay a few more days, but she agreed to go to a new country and start a new life… without looking back. (Genesis 24:55-61)
What did I learn from this?
In the journey that I am on… or maybe a new one that I am coming to… God is taking my hands and helping me to move forward. To not hesitate with what His plan is for my life and trust him enough that I shouldn’t look back. I need the courage of Rebekah through whatever this next phase is.
But the question comes back to me… do I have enough trust in Him that I can do this?
I hope so. Because I really want to see what’s next.
Do you have enough trust that you wouldn’t look back?
Wow…what a question. I’d like to think that I do but I can’t just today I posted to our blog about how I so easily am tempted to slip back into what I think are comfort zones of my life but are honestly are things that hold me back, make me focus on God less and…well…”anything other than God” more. Thankfully I have a wife and some good friends that God has placed in my life; who are willing to speak into my life – to take my hands…bear hug me if that’s what it takes to keep me moving down a path that I truly DO want to be on; truly DO love; but that seems to be assaulted more often than ever.
Great post, Julie!
-Joel
Your Question and post really hit home for me today. Giving full 100% trust in the Lord has always been a struggle for me. I pray daily to be able to just let go and raise my hands to the Lord and fully submit to him, and have total faith and trust that he will not do me wrong. It’s something I pray that I will be able to do with all my heart.
I really wish i could answer yes to that question but unfortunately I can’t. I’m trying though. Good luck and God’s blessings for you!
Cheers
Joanne
- Rainforest Mommy
I totally have trust issues too. Not with people though… just with God. Which is totally ironic, since He’s the flawless one with my best interests in mind. However, I do rely on Him way more than on people, so there’s more trust to be had. Great post.
Trust is such a big issue…I can relate to what you are saying. For me, I started out trusting EVERYONE…and I was so very gullible. As time went on, I got burned, stomped on , dropped in the grease. Now as an adult, it is incredibly hard to trust. I have found that there aren’t many people that I truly like..and that is horrible! It’s not that I don’t like people in general…it’s that I don’t trust them enough to spend time with them and like them. It makes me nervous to be around a group of people…I truly don’t trust them. My mind tells me that others must have some sort of motive when they are nice to me…otherwise why would they be nice to me at all? I can’t trust that maybe they just like me.
I am following your 90 day journal of the bible. I hope that soon I can do the same thing. I think it’s something that we all need to do…start a new relationship with God so that we can learn to have relationships with people…. Rock On! And thanks so much for sharing your journey with us!